A Mom killed on her way home from visiting her brand new babes in the NICU.
Senseless killing in Vegas.
A young husband and father’s plane crashes and he has yet to be found.
Two of my three children are going to be taken away because they aren’t biologically mine.
I want to crawl down further into the sheets colored to match my mood because I can’t handle the suffering in the world anymore.
I cling tightly to the tiny brown-eyed one sleeping peacefully above my broken heart. I want to save her from everything. The wild blue-eyed one sleeps in the next room and I weep over the fact that I cannot protect him from the trauma that is his world.
The suffering of this world and the goodness of God are irreconcilable in my mind. The fear living in such a world leaves my heart shredded. Void of power. Empty of genuine love. Lacking sound mind.
The perfect recipe for the “whyGods”
Why are you doing this Lord? God, can’t you do this?
The suffering of this world can crush me or compel me.
Only two choices here. Satan wins or I cling desperately and at times pathetically to the promises of God, compelled to live the “thywillbedones” instead. See, there is a time for feeling soul crushed, a time to weep and a time to mourn. There are times of tribulation and affliction. There is a time to look at the suffering in the world and in your own home and weep.
But this I call to mind,
and therefore I have hope: Lamentations 3:21
Though the suffering may seem to overwhelm God’s love-the perfect kind that casts out fear- God’s love never changes.
The reality of God’s love never changes. Our realization and recognition of it does. Allowing us to bravely live what we humbly pray: Thy will be done.