Don’t you hate those days when you can almost watch yourself from outside yourself falling prey to every one of Satan’s snares?
Last Sunday was that way for me. RSV and ear infections had house bound my babes and I four days straight. I was convinced if I heard the “Little Einsteins” theme song one more time I would probably end up in a straight jacket. I remember when we were pursuing foster care certification I would lay in bed at night wondering what the sacrifices of motherhood would be and how they would make me feel. I knew things would change and I would have to give up “me time” and some of the things I loved but I always would come back around to the thought “Surely God wouldn’t allow motherhood to keep me from good things.” Sunday rolled around and left us rolling out of bed only for popsicles and tea. I had to fight off frustration. Sundays are days of refreshment for our family. Even when I miss the service because of a fussy baby, simply being in the house of God awakens a peace in my heart.
This was not that kind of Sunday. I could feel Satan winning in my heart and I determined that I needed some coffee and a whole lot of Jesus if I was going to overturn this battle. So far it was Satan: 1 million, Mommy:0. I pulled Husband in close and tucked toddler-boy under my arm with a granola bar and we tuned in to one of my favorite Pastor’s/Father-in-law’s live stream An Evangelist was speaking loud and pacing about the floor proclaiming the sin nature of all of humanity by going through the 10 Commandments proving that we were all indeed sinners. Suddenly wiggly boy was still.
“How many of you have ever lied?” The speaker asked bluntly.
Toddler boy slowly raises his hand. I’m shocked that he was listening.
“…the Bible says obey your Father and Mother, how bout that one? Have you ever disobeyed?”
Big blue eyes stare at me, “Is he talking to me Mommy?”
I do my best to explain that lying to Mama is also lying to God and that disobeying Mama is also disobeying God. “Breaks God’s heart Mama?”
I cannot hold back the tears. Yes little one! Sin breaks God’s heart! Oh the simplicity of the Gospel that little children may come onto him! Suddenly the frustration with our situation vanished.
Mama, I know you are frustrated. Your feet are tied and sometimes your blessed littles keep you from even good things. I cannot give you tips for how to get more organized so that you feel better (Lord knows that is not my spiritual gift) I cannot list steps that you can take to make your children behave better, but I can show you how to refocus your Mama-heart in the situation you are in now.
1. Get the Gospel in
Do it! It doesn’t really matter that much how you do it, just get it into your ears and mind let it trickle down into the broken places in your soul. Right now I am reading this simple devotional book given to me by a precious lady in my church. Each day is short, simple and always includes verses from the inspired Word of God (not just an authors flowery words.) Sometimes I legitimately read through it while that blessed Keurig is brewing my cup of life giving goodness. I have friends who listen to the Bible being read on audio book. Another Mama friend says that she has to have her time with the Lord under a blanket tent that she makes herself every morning in her bed and her littles know not to disturb Mommy in her “Jesus tent!” Leave a comment below on your favorite method of getting God’s word in each day.
2. Be Thankful
I know, trust me I do. This is hard. When you are up to your elbows in dirty dishes and the toddler overflowed the tub again and hubby sends a text that he won’t be home until much later than you had hoped. Stop what you are doing. Get a piece of paper and a pen and write down ten things you are thankful for. Pray over them. See each of them as God’s incredible grace. If your kiddos are old enough have them do the same and watch it change their little attitudes too.
3. Hold Them
Yes, I know sometimes all we want is some quiet and some space and for goodness sake no one to be touching me right now! This little quote has become my motto
“With-ness breaks brokenness…” Ann Voskamp
Our little ones are just as broken as we are some days. Be with them. Hold them close. Notice the curve of their sweet little cheeks, trace their pudgy fingers, stare into their wonder-filled eyes and allow yourself to be filled with that same wonder. You get to be their Mama.
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